let yourself get dated

if you know me well, you know i have a thing for dates. i remember dates of when things have happened in the past, know the date of when things are planning on happening in the future. if you ask me what i'm doing on saturday, i'd rather you tell me saturday's date rather than that it is saturday. i've got a thing for dates. i feel that the first "date" i can recall though is in 2005, so... i don't think i had a thing for dates before then ;) but nonetheless, now with it being 2013, i've got 8 years of dates rackin' up!

so, let me "date" you in this journey thus far.
oh journey, what a word... it's not called a trip because this "thing" has been no trip! trips are quick, journeys are not so much...

january 2010-may 2010 : lost 15lbs. during my semester in kenya due to a complete lifestyle change
may 2010-august 2010 : gained 5 pounds, due to a shift back to american culture i'm sure ;)
august 2010-february 2011 : lost 20 lbs. by counting calories
february 2011-august 2011 : hit a plateau and maintained weight
summer 2012 : got a clue and got educated on clean eating, paleo, etc.
august 2011-january 2013 : fluctuated between a gain of 5-10 lbs. from last lost weight

                                                                                     *we lost 60 pounds in a year between the 2 of us!


blah. i'm tired of fluctuating and not losing... for a year and a half!
what am i doing wrong? i've asked myself.
what more can i do? i've asked myself.
why isn't this working?! i've asked myself.

sure there have been those few times that i fell to the temptations of snacks in the teacher's lounge or had a slice of cake after a homemade dinner at my parents or for a birthday celebration, but... still!

i've gone weeks without sugar... cut that out in hopes for a shift off of the plateau called fluctuate.
i've gone a month without bread... and still here we are.
i've cut out 95% of processed foods.
i make my lunches for school.
i have kept food diaries.
i have meal planned.
i don't buy junk food.
i hardly ever eat out.
i haven't eaten at a fast food restaurant for 2.5 months except for ONE time.
i keep healthy snacks in my car for those times after school when i NEED a snack, or i will probably die. and so i'm not tempted to drive through starbucks or mcdonald's or taco bell!
i didn't drink any coffee drink for a week. (this is a big deal!)
i eat whole grains, if i do eat something "grainy".
i eat fruits and vegetables and eggs and very little dairy.
i've basically broken up with my beloved ice cream and enjoy it perhaps twice a month... whereas i used to consume it a few times a week.
i don't eat late at night and make sure the last time i eat is at least a few hours before i go to sleep.
so what's up?!

i've read that abs are made in the kitchen, not the gym... 30% gym, 70% diet. so that's what i've been working on... WHAT'S HAPPENING IN THE KITCHEN... for the last 6-9 months!

                                                                                                                    *january 11, 2013

two months ago, i wanted to get serious. (as if i wasn't sorta kinda serious already!) i took this "before" picture in hopes that in maybe 1, 2, 4, 6 months, there'd be changes! i bought a scale and took some tips from a trustworthy friend and started weighing myself daily. but in a month, i weighed .4 lbs more... and have simply FLUCTUATED the past 2 months.

welcome. to. my. life.
i am annoyed.

so starting last week, march 4... i started movin'. i created a playlist called "get movin' girl" (the inspiration for this blog) and even bought a few songs i heard during a biggest loser episode a few days before. i also started a "food and moving" journal, called "eat and move, move and eat" (after marcel's treats and snoozin', snoozin' and treats)... tryin' to keep this JOURNEY a little light-hearted and not so overwhelmingly difficult and annoying. so i've been movin' to some hip hop abs, a little yoga poses even once with jillian michaels, some jogging, some planking, 50-75 situps a few times a week... and yet in a week... i'm still just hanging out around the same ol' number on the same ol' scale.

hioahfdkfhjdsheiohnenlfnalfndkfbsdjfbskfdsnxaalhebkjfndngdn.

maybe i shouldn't weigh myself every day?
maybe i'm stressed and can't lose weight for some odd reason?
maybe...
maybe...
maybe...
WHAT?!

i don't expect an overnight change... maybe even not a simple lost pound or two in a week's time... but what.the.heck.is.goin.on.

sigh.
i'll keep keepin' on.
doing my best to stay motivated.
hoping for the best and for my desires to be fulfilled.

i truly believe that i'm healthy. i do not take any medication or vitamins. i haven't had any medical issues and get sick maybe ONCE a year. but the thing is, i have a desire to be fit. i'm so conscious about what i eat and sure, sometimes i purposefully eat something i straight up know i probably shouldn't, but everything is ok in moderation, right?! ;) no, but seriously, I'M TRYING!

but... why aren't things CHANGING?!
it's a mystery.
a mystery i'm lookin' to solve.

and now you've been dated in full regards to this mysterious everlasting and ever-trying journey.
stay tuned.